Life on planet Earth

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Life on planet Earth

Postby ghost » Wed Aug 02, 2006 7:15 pm

Now I know what I wanna be when I grow up: a langurwallah.

http://www.nbcnews.com/id/14121007/ns/world_news-weird_news/t/india-train-company-turns-monkey-business/#.VRhPY_nF-So

India train company turns to monkey business:
Fierce-looking primate employed to keep wayward monkeys off subways

NEW DELHI, India - They say it takes a thief to catch a thief, but India’s Delhi Metro has hired a monkey to frighten off other monkeys from boarding trains and upsetting passengers.
In an effort to keep monkeys out of the New Delhi subways, authorities have called in one of the few animals known to scare the creatures — a fierce-looking primate called the langur, the Hindustan Times newspaper reported Wednesday.
The decision to hire a langurwallah — a man who trains and controls the langurs — came after a monkey got into a metro car June 9, the newspaper reported.
In that incident, a monkey boarded a train at the underground Chawri Bazaar station and reportedly scared passengers by scowling at them for three stops. It then disembarked at Civil Lines station.
Passengers had to be moved to another car while staff chased the dexterous creature, causing delays.
The Delhi Metro Rail Corporation says it hopes the new hire will avert a repeat of that episode.
“It started working about a month ago and since then we’ve not had a single incident,” said Anuj Dayal, a metro spokesman.
The langur handler is being paid a retainer of India rupees 6,900 ($160) a month, and “he will be called whenever there is a monkey problem,” Dayal was quoted as saying.
“There are too many monkeys,” Dayal was quoted as saying.
Langur monkeys are similarly employed around the grounds of parliament and some government buildings in New Delhi.
Last edited by ghost on Sun Mar 29, 2015 8:19 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby axillaptiii » Fri Aug 04, 2006 1:19 am

just... wow.


cool, but when you look at it.. it should have been one of those things spoofed on futurama.
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Postby dmcnul91 » Fri Aug 04, 2006 1:22 am

goddamn monkeys.......
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Postby gamecat » Fri Aug 04, 2006 5:06 pm


In that incident, a monkey boarded a train at the underground Chawri Bazaar station and reportedly scared passengers by scowling at them for three stops. It then disembarked at Civil Lines station.


passengers scared by a scowl?

That happens to me everyday in the subway here in Chicago.
I'm sure in New York as well.

Indians are scaredy cats.
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Postby fone » Fri Aug 04, 2006 7:30 pm

Image

Silver Langur
Go down in your own way
And everyday is the right day
And as you rise above the fear lines in his frown
You look down
Hear the sound of the faces in the crowd
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Postby neck » Fri Aug 04, 2006 8:03 pm

look at that smug look on his face...that little bastard.
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Postby Swartzbaugh » Fri Aug 04, 2006 8:13 pm

Are you sure it's an Indian guy with a sweet sweater?
#913
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Postby goldphish » Sat Aug 05, 2006 5:27 am

I don't know that langur doesn't look too "fierce"... I don't see why the monkeys just can't jump him and kick his ass.

maybe the langur has some secret karate moves or shames them with his enormous private parts...
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Postby axillaptiii » Sun Aug 06, 2006 4:42 am

I don't know about you, but I don't really wanna fuck with something as acrobatic as a monkey...
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Postby ghost » Wed Aug 16, 2006 5:42 pm

Switching gears slightly, but still pretty much erratic behavior from some monkeys here on planet Earth. I can't even begin to put into words all the things that are wrong with this picture.

Image
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Postby Buster » Wed Aug 16, 2006 9:02 pm

Life on planet earth= dunzo.
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Postby ghost » Mon Sep 11, 2006 5:53 am

I read this in the news. Pleasant Prairie, Wisconsin is 10 miles northeast of my parents' home in northern Illinois.


A Kenosha man is dead after getting sucked into a wood chipper.

Thirty-year-old Jeremiah Sanders, the owner of J's Quality Tree Service, was killed Tuesday at a home he was working at in Pleasant Prairie.

Sanders got caught in the chipper after using his foot to free a log that had gotten jammed.

Sanders' nephew, Adam Sanders heard his uncle's cries for help. "I had to hear him say help me, help me, come and help me and the sounds of him being chipped up."

Sanders' co-workers desperately tried to stop the chipper and even put it in reverse, but it didn't work.

"As I was trying to hit the reverse I looked down and he (Sanders) was up to his ribs and I turned around, I couldn't watch and listen no more, I had to get out of there," Adam said.

"It seemed like forever but the chipping experience I have to say it probably took about 7 seconds and it had to be the worse way to die."

A tearful James Bennett saw the terrible accident happen on his property in Pleasant Prairie.

"All of sudden he started going in and I started yelling, 'Stop the machine, stop the machine!' They couldn't hear me. He just went right in and then I came running up to tell my wife."

Jeremiah Sanders had two daughters and a baby on the way.

The Sander' family has set up a fund for his children at the First Banking Center in Kenosha. To help out call 262-657-9110.

"He was a good hearted brother and he always helped people out," says William Sanders, Jeremiah's brother.

OSHA is investigating why the reverse bar on the wood chipper did not work.
Last edited by Anonymous on Mon Sep 11, 2006 5:54 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Postby willbreathes » Mon Sep 11, 2006 2:12 pm

That really, really, really, really sucks.

But what a dumbass.
1. tipsyfuddledboozygroggyelevatedprimedidedither ...
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Postby famusmockingbird » Mon Sep 11, 2006 11:59 pm

what a horrible way to go.
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Postby OlfactoryHue » Tue Sep 12, 2006 1:36 am

man, i thought i was reading a movie script.

that would be pretty unimaginable to expierence or witness.

i don't think i could witness that and be okay, "up to his ribs"

i can picture it now, i see poor Steve Buscemi getting minced

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Postby famusmockingbird » Tue Sep 12, 2006 11:19 am

a guy goes through the woodchipper in the movie "fargo" i'm pretty sure.
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Postby ghost_2000 » Tue Sep 12, 2006 2:20 pm

^
not just any guy.

Steve Buscemi!
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Postby ghost » Tue Sep 12, 2006 4:55 pm

That was just a movie...some human replica parts and fake blood being shoved into a smaller wood chipper. This was real-life-Joe-Six-Pack kicking...well, flailing and screaming while his entire body was sucked into a huge wood chipper. The short experience for him and the experience for all the witnesses must have been insane. Those are images and feelings that will always be rattling around in their heads. The rest of us can see it as a strong example of what-not-to-do around machinery.
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Postby goldphish » Tue Sep 12, 2006 5:09 pm

YIKES!

I'm caring for an old man who lost half his arm in a wood chipper. I though that was bad enough!
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Postby ghost_2000 » Tue Sep 12, 2006 6:38 pm

If I can think of ways NOT to die, it'd be something like this:

1. Airplane crash
2. Eaten alive
3. Burned alive
4. Drowning
5. Bleeding to death (stab, gunshot, etc)
6. WOODCHIPPER!
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Postby axillaptiii » Tue Sep 12, 2006 10:06 pm



PHISH2K

[aim]
[homepage] [email] [send pm]

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Re: Life on planet Earth
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Postby ghost » Wed Sep 20, 2006 10:30 pm

Where is "crushed by snake" on your list? "I thought the snake loved me like I loved him!"

LANESVILLE, Ind. - A 14-foot pet python crushed its owner to death, authorities said Tuesday after finding the snake loose in a southern Indiana shed with the man
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Postby axillaptiii » Wed Sep 20, 2006 11:18 pm


1. Airplane crash
2. Eaten alive
3. Burned alive
4. Drowning
5. Bleeding to death (stab, gunshot, etc)
6. Woodchipper
7. Langur Attack
8. Crushed by Snake
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Postby ghost » Tue Oct 10, 2006 7:16 pm

Whoa whoa, whoa. You want the what to ride the what?

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Postby ghost » Sat Nov 04, 2006 7:35 pm

This guy lives here on planet Earth. And there are countless more people like him. Maybe in your neighborhood.

Police arrest naked man after he allegedly said he had a tool in his rectum

EL CERRITO, Calif. - A man was arrested on suspicion of carrying a concealed weapon after police found him outdoors
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