Find a Joke, Post a Joke

Two men are driving through Newark when they get pulled over by a Patrol Officer. The cop walks up and taps on the window with his nightstick.

The driver rolls down the window and WHACK, the cop smacks him in the head with the stick. The driver asks, “What the hell was that for?”

The cop answers, “You’re in Newark son. When we pull you over, you better have your license ready when we get to your car.” The driver says, “I’m sorry, Officer, I’m not from around here.”

The cop runs a check on the guy’s license, and he’s clean. He gives the guy his license back, walks around to the passenger side and taps on the window. The passenger rolls down the window and WHACK, the cop smacks him on the head with the nightstick.

The passenger asks, “What’d you do that for?”
The cop says, “Just making your wish come true.”

The passenger asks, “Making what wish come true?”

The cop says, "I know that two miles down the road you’re gonna say to your buddy, “I wish that asshole would’ve tried that shit with me!”

I went to my doctor and told him “my penis is burning.” He said, “That means somebody is talking about it.”

What did the vampire say to the teacher?

see you next period!

When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading.
— Henny Youngman

^
I’m going to have to remember that one!

Yeah, its more of a quote really.

But a brilliant one for sure.