Mike's Corner Thread

Non-Phish Phish Band Members
#1

from Mike’s Corner, Daunting Literary Snippets from Phish’s Bassist Mike Gordon, p. 80:

The fishes were so bewildered and bumble-blasted by this spewing of seemingly meaningless blabbermint, this flaunting of neo-ambiguous information, that they headed right back into the water and swam to a psychiatrist.

#2

also from Mike’s Corner, Daunting Literary Snippets from Phish’s Bassist Mike Gordon, p. 69:

Once there were four hundred pieces of crab brain resting on a gray insurance company seat.

While that line doesn’t really stand on its own as really particularly funny, I remember laughing about it a lot when I first read it. In fact, that particular Mike’s Corner story kind of sold me on Phish.

#3

another one, p. 138:

Part III
Bibsy called. Ma Pierson slid a pickle down her thick throat. It went down without chewing or swallowing, but it was delicious all the same.

#4

Okay, one more:

p. 66:

Here we go:

Alright here it is now:

[i]The next day the phone rang. It was judge Whimples Gavel. He thought I should serve some duty.
"Sure I'm all duty."
The 8-ohmer ended up being the one in trouble. I would've voted "Yes", but I voted "No - hang the mother." It's great being so smart-assed, I thought as I whimpled home.[/i]
#5

^ Only Mike could whimple home.

#6

Love this thread!

#7

Why did you place an aerial assault on the board this morning?

What did the board ever do to you?

#8

::wonders why Neil is so mad him::

#9

End of Chapter Two

~Review Questions~

  1. Compare and contrast every letter of the story with every other letter.
  2. Get out.
#10

From “The Job”, p 31"

Franz said, “Rex, as far as people like you go, you’re a jewel.” This made Rex smile. He smiled not only in the Corp. but later outside it. He even thought, “I’m outside it and I’m smiling.”

#11

From “A Burning Sensation” p 89:

[i]Then it finally happened. Boom-smash, scream skull smash, quick flip shoot sky and I had fallen into the sky of China.

Vroom faster faster as I passed by Chinese parachuters and birds. Finally Shcramowza!! I landed on Chinese soil with my shovel in hand - the same shovel I had used to start the hole in my backyard.[/i]

#12

Im feeling Bilingual in a trilingual world.

I got that book some where, Its been throgh hell. I used to make my friends read it when they were tripping.

#13

Bess

Bess Dangercity walked over to her spam cupboard and pulled out a can of Spam.
“Shit, this is wormed!” remarked Bess in an all-too-feminine way.
On another day, in another land of green, Bess’s father wished several things to be true. The first wish to be true of, was an examination of the fricative. Second be do be true be combo fricabump.

-End of Chapter One-

Review Questions:

  1. Where does Bess’s Paw obviously live?
  2. What does this chapter imply about worm base?
#14

F*ckin’ shook the man’s hand again tonight.

::marks scoreboard > one handshake, hosemasterflex::

#15

awesome.

#16

Basic Electricity

Chapter I

For this dangerous yet exciting experiment, you will need an egg and some wire.
Hold one end of the wire and stick it into the side of your neck. Push the wire into your neck until it comes out somewhere else. Then grab both ends of the wire and pull so hard that the wire slices through your neck and comes out. Then place the egg inside the big slice in your neck and try to crack it by moving your head around.

Review Questions

  1. What does this experiment show us about static electricity?

  2. Suggest a way to do the same experiment without the egg.

#17

^ ouch.