my boxers are striped and my hat is camoflauge...

Non-Phish General
#41

i woke up and reached into my pants pocket…the pants had been splayed across the floor in a pattern that reminded me of some sort of double helix. when i pulled my cigarettes out of the pocket i noticed that my knuckle hadnt scraped across the grip of the knife as it usually does. this worried me…i couldnt remember events from the past evening nor could i remember pulling my knife off its trusty hold on the rim of my pocket.

later in the day when i got to my car i saw my knife lying on the floor mat on the passenger side…open…covered in sticky, shiney, black tar…i called my friend and he seemed to have no idea what the tar could have been…

i still dont know what it was…but its still on there. and it wont come off…so now when i use it to cut my cuticles i am left with black smudges. i need a good solvent…or maybe i just need to make solvent hash.

hmmm.

#42

it makes sense now, you know? it all makes sense., everything has fallen together perfectly.

it doesn’t really matter who your with, or what they’re doing, it doesn’t matter if they like you…what was I talking about?

shit, I forgot. sorry about that.

whatever.

you know what makes a great soup? salad. and breadsticks. yummers!

#43

Kinda like when you’re riding down a hill on your bike and your wheels fall off. Doesn’t change the fact that ice cream doesn’t have bones.

#44

cow shit i know

#45

fly shit i care?

#46

bare ass me later

#47

why does brett lie and say hes decorating a tree when he could be watching jazz and getting drunk with neck?

#48

the spider weaved a web through the eye of the needle and cast it off the edge of the degree . then he saw it therre and said to the dread, dude you might need that needle to thread the sky together so it dont fall down

#49

I feel like I just licked the MIND OF GOD.

#50

sneezed on a duvee cover with silk cover and then went into living room and sneezed on silk pillows and then had lasagna with burnt cheese for the christmas tree trimming sneeze

#51

olives.

pastrami.

foccacia.

other things.

#52

The moral of the story, polar bears, is don’t be a menace to south central while drinking your juice in the hood…and the duvet cover is not the issue here, dude.

#53

your all nutz

#54

Are you sure the casserole is done baking or are you just scared of the water? A wise old moron once told me that the best way to see the world was through chocolate covered glasses…makes everything sweet. What’s the matter, don’t you like chocolate???

#55

Candy is dandy, but liqour is quicker

#56

the great zen philosopher basho once said “a flute with no holes is not a flute…and a donut with no holes is a danish.”

#57

Alright people… Get your priorities crooked!

#58

Is that a donut in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?

#59

peanut butter L is dangerous and fun to give to 5 year olds on the bussss, FURTHUR more, there is fungus amoung us

#60

baked brie and nacho cheese doritos is not a good combination.