Phish and your other half...

Phish General
#41

It definitely took a couple of years for her to come around, and that’s without the benefit of being able to take her (or me) to an actual phish show. I’d say Erin loves Phish as much as I do now…and it’s not always a good thing. I basically can’t go see Phish this new years because she can’t afford it, and I can’t afford to pay for two of us. So, if she didn’t like Phish, then I could, arguably, be going on my own.

It’s kind of a win-lose situation if you’re other half does like phish. I’d like to think it’s more win that lose though, especially because if I were with a girl that didn’t like Phish, I don’t know what we’d have in common.

#42

Great thread :thumbup: . My wife does indeed like the Phish thanks to me… and like Fundirectors g/f, Page is her favorite. She’s not as big a fan of the psychedelic side of Phish, however… we went to Darien, Hartford and SPAC this summer and Hartford was her least favorite. What can I say… she likes to dance (she loved Dinner and a Movie at Darien!).

#43

my gf (her name is jennifer) says all the time that she hates trey’s voice and “you and your phish obsession” :unamused: :unamused: i keep telling her she needs to see one show before she completely closes her mind to the band and she dances around the issue. yes, “jennifer dances” :thumbup: when i tried to make that joke to her she told me i made that up :thumbdown: maybe some day she’ll understand, but i’m not counting on it…

#44

dump her immediately…

#45

Good stories all around… I am lucky that my girlfriend loves Phish. But in recent months, she has started to become interested in some pretty STUPID music and listening less and less to the Phish. As a matter of fact her entire lifestyle has changed into something I don’t really like, clothing, music, etc… I hope she is not getting tired of them, cuz like posted above, my music (Phish in particular) is very important to me and call me silly, but a huge part of my life and most definitely a huge part of my future, so I have my fingers crossed that this new lifestyle she is trying to portray is just temporary.

#46

Our prayers are with you.

#47

Dan and I love Phish and find even more love of The Phish together. We go to almost all the shows together (except for when I went out east without him). I can not imagine having a husband that didn’t get phish and wasn’t into it like me. Going to shows together brings us closer.

#48

I’ll quote my ex: “If I go to a Phish show, I’ll hate it then resent you.” Obviously speaks more toward her unwillingness to compromise and hence, why she’s the ex! :smiley:

#49

Good plan.

Ali likes Phish alright, though she prefers the studio albums to live. She can appreciate how great they are, but it just doesn’t do it for her like some other music. I think she feels like she has to work too hard to listen to Phish, which I can understand. She came to the first 09 Gorge show with me, but developed a headache and ended up sleeping through the second set. She tried though, and that was cool. Mike’s her favorite… She’s always hated when the jams go way out, but at that show she was like, “I figured out that all I have to do is listen to Mike when I don’t know what’s going on…” Honestly, I think she’d be all about them if it weren’t for Trey. She thinks he’s pretentious and hogs the spotlight too much. She has her favorite songs though: Ocelot, Simple, Possum, Poor Heart, Harpua…

She puts up with my obsessive checking of setlists and downloading of shows pretty well, and doesn’t judge me for running to grab my Phish Companion to cross-reference some statistical tidbit. Like Gamecat says… I wouldn’t expect her to dig Phish like I do. I’m just glad she doesn’t hate them!

#50

my gf loves phish, not as much as me, she is a HUGE GD fan, but i am turning her to the dark side :mrgreen:

#51

My ex used to hate Phish, now out of spite she prances around with all the “Website Merch” on…I mean come on, were almost thirty??? Liking a band now out of spite? Anyone else have something like this happen?

I’m all good now though, refer to my 'wet panties" post ^^. :laughing:

#52

I have dated some casual fans, one fan as hardcore as I am, and a deadhead who HATED Phish. None of those worked out. Phish is such a big part of who I am that it was hard to find the right balance…until I met Holt.

He LOVES music. Music is his life. Has seen ALOT of shows over the years. His favorites are Allmans, Derek Trucks Band, David Nelson (new riders of the purple sage), and much to my dismay, Warren Haynes. He is very diverse though. He enjoys bluegrass, 90s grunge ala PJ, STP, and Nirvana, jam, folk singer/songwriter, and balls to the wall rock and roll.

When it comes to Phish, obviously he is not hardcore like I am, but he digs it. I took him to Knoxvill and Charlottesville and he liked them both. I try not to bombard him with it but I do tend to on road trips. I just don’t want him to get all “here we go again” about Phish.

He is perfectly cool and supportive about me going to shows whether it’s with him if I ask him to go, or if I wanna go by myself, he gladly says “go do your thing”. Sometimes I am glad he is there and sometimes I am glad he isn’t. It’s nice to share it with him and sometimes it’s nice to have it for myself.

I love hitting the road for a show with him. He is so easy to be with and never stresses about details. His former lifestyle (sleeping outside and hitch hiking to shows) means we can do things pretty cheap and with minimal accommodations. He is very easy to please. Plus he is a fantastic navigator. The man can read a map like none other. Once the lights go down, he shakes his thang and I don’t even care that he has no rhythym ha.

I try to reciprocate and see shows with him, but honestly I haven’t done that great.I did spend 8 hrs at the Warren Haynes xmas jam, so that had to win major points ha. Like he says, I am a music snob. Thankfully, my husband is not :slight_smile:

#53

My wife does not like Phish and I wouldn’t have it any other way. I was engaged to a woman who I used to tour with for a few years…not a fan. At times it had its perks, but now that I’m on the other side of the fence it’s much better. I like being on the solo mission at shows and not having to worry about ANYTHING else. The only time it gets frustrating is at home when I really want to listen to some Phish and I get the “please not now…”, but if it wasn’t for her I’d listen to Phish more than one person should. She likes some crappy music, but for the most part she can at least identify that it’s “crappy” in terms of uncreative or just plain bad. “Yes this is a horrible song, but it’s fun” is usually what I get in response to my criticism. Other than that we have a decent common ground we can enjoy together.

But in terms of seeing live Phish…that’s my time. And I can’t complain, I saw 11 shows in 2009 by myself and flew out to California from Michigan for Festival 8 without her. It’s a pretty good deal, she doesn’t “get it” and I stopped trying to make her. I did tell her I would like her to go see one show with me some time as Phish means so much to me and she does too, but I don’t know if that is ever going to happen.

#54

I would be considered the other half and i am so happy i get it now. At first I didn’t get it at all. One day we were wasted and we watched the bIttersweet motel and it clicked for me. I spent alot of time wishing phish would come back. Then heard about Hampton. My dreams had come true!! Then in January found out i was preggo. It was the worst!! I am 5 foot nothing and i couldn’t get any real air while trying to get in. I was trying to jump upwards to grab a breath of real oxygen and not chain smoked cigarettes. Needless to say I didn’t take any drugs or anything,but everyones face got real blurry. Yeah i passed out…not completely was awake enough just to hold on so i could be dragged out of the crowd. Then he said now we have to do it again. So i made it. They opened with fluffhead and my sweet harpua cried. To think i used to think they were all playing a different song at once.

#55

my wife says she hates phish, but i think she’s jerking my chain. i think she really likes them. i’ve caught her grooving to gin and funky bitch a few times when she thought i wasn’t looking. i really want to get her to a show, but she has no interest. maybe this summer if there is a tour…

#56

Well, my gf is nto all that into any music, let alone Phish. Sometimes i wonder how we have lasted 4 years based off of this fact alone…but we have a good relationship, and i love her very much.
The thing that i think really helps, is that although she doesn’t enjoy it, she understands, and accepts, my obsession with it. She is aware that some people live for the music, and respects that I am one of them.
When i tell her something that I find interesting, or funny, that the band said/did, she at least seesm to pay attention.
She does join us for the shows we attend, and tells me that the main reason she does it is becuase she likes to see me so happy…but I think the other main reason is she doesn;t want to miss out on the fun.
The most difficult part of it all is the money. When tour is announced, and we start talking about what shows we want to go to, all she sees is dollar $igns disappearing.
But, I was able to catch 7 shows in 09 (including the Hampton shows), so i can’t really argue that i am missing out all that much.
(already socking away cash for the NYE-MSG run)

#57

That’s super cool. My ex used to say the same thing, and would come to shows just b/c I enjoyed them so much and she liked seeing me happy. It’d make me a little self-conscious once in awhile, though :blush:

#58

My wife will always be about 50 shows ahead of me! :clap:

#59

All that matters is the next show

#60

Many of you have met my Wife, she rocks it for Phish and lets me plan the shows and the travel… I love seeing Phish with her!